My Bergen blues

When I ended up in rainy Bergen
it split me into three
one is the past life of me
one is the present life of me
one is the endless worry
as if an old and replanted tree
which has seen some 37 winters and tall
it was me and not me at all

I was worried about my mother's health
whom I would leave alone with a heart attack
I was worried about my father's work
whom I would leave face-to-face with the KGB
which would try to save itself by cruelty rather than pity
if they will find you in peace
calm like water and stubborn
might do everything to leave you in pieces
for one wishes sooner to ride his wooden horse
than being one of the vicious

I thought about our future
what could happen to the nation
things that people won't control
how we would deal with it
what could be to our dreams
what would be of my wife
who was a teacher
what would be of my children
could we stay safe
could we survive

It was a foreign land
which I never thought to be
but the people were friendly
they were not angry at all
a teacher told me that
he doesn't know what a headache is
before I never thought it was possible
I looked into many strangers' eyes
they were not hungry at all

Though it was so comforting
I wish I had stayed at home
where I belonged from the beginning
where one thinks one thing
to say often another thing or none
as it split people into not two or three
but nineteen ninety-nine
nevertheless, when I am so homesick
I wish I had not gone